Holy Crap, It Happened Again!

By which, I mean, updating this thing. Hell, if this keeps up, I might actually have to let people know it's here or something...

So, I just spent a couple of hours reading over my older writings, and I had a revelation during one of the classic Pissing Vinegars. I won't copy and paste it (or bother looking it up, for that matter), but I believe the line was something like, "fuck you in your musty ass with an acid-dipped kendo stick".

That's when it hit me. I have lost it. Absolutely, completely fucking lost it.

"It", of course, being my creative spark. I just can't come up with shit like that anymore. And, I have to wonder, what happened? Did I burn out too many brain cells on the heavy metal music? Did that whole writer's block episode cause permanent damage to my wit? Was it that dramatic and overblown "I'm going to become a better person and speak out on social issues" shit? Because, looking back, every Colin, Dick and Bush was playing that game in '04. Sure, I care about global warming, the state of our economy and the impending nuclear holocaust, but do you see me in the streets of Washington D.C. with a burning effigy? I might be stupider than I used to be, but I know for a fact that it's much safer to rage against global injustice in an electronic forum, as opposed to within range of sniper's bullets.

I know... it's the mental stability thing. Of course! The whole time I was cranking out those witty, relentless tongue lashings, I was under a certain amount of stress. I was harbouring animosity in some form or another toward my environment. Face it; when I wrote those things, even though I tried my best to keep it humourous, I was pissed off.

And, I know, on occasions it got to a point where it stopped being funny (sometimes it never started being funny). When I wrote about the bank, I'm sure that deep down inside, I really wanted to firebomb the damned place. McDonald's, Sobeys, NB Power, the hospital, Bobby Clarke... the reason I wrote about these things is because they did something to make me unhappy.

It's so obvious. I'm providing less wit and vitriol simply because I'm happier than I was back then.

So, if you're waiting on a slew of new Pissing Vinegars, fuck that. I'll be trying my hardest not to come up with more of those. But, if you still feel like dropping by from time to time, I'll try not to be as anti-social as I once was.

I know, it's not the most entertaining shit I've ever written. Then again, it's not 2001 anymore, and my job isn't to entertain.

I'm just trying to keep in touch.