Alert Status: Teal

Happy Memorial Day, you Yankee capitalist swine! Heh... just kidding, don't want to let one bad apple spoil the whole bush... er, let one bad Bush spoil the whole apple... um... forget it.

Here's the latest. Work is getting slightly more tolerable. A proposed schedule change is going to give us the same amount of hours, but more days off. Can you say "four day weekend"? Every three weeks, baby.

I'd go across the street, but I can't afford the gas. I'm still waiting for the PV to perculate on this matter. Give it time, kids.

Recently, I've been spending a lot of my down time drinking coffee and playing Magic, as my transformation from normal human being to evil mutant dork is a go, full steam ahead. I'll say this about the geeky card game, though. When I'm playing, my problems are the furthest thing from my mind. That, and it's a godsend for the collector in me.

I've also been watching some movies. Recent views have been Big Fish and Bubba Ho-Tep. Both pretty good flicks.

We're in the dog days of music. There really hasn't been much that's blown me away this year. Then again, I think I've been raising my standards a lot higher since the Mars Volta album rocked my ever-loving balls off. Although, I am looking forward to a few releases. The Hip have never disappointed me, and it seems that every summer, without fail, an album comes out of nowhere and wins Album of the Year (see At the Drive-In in 2000, Tool & System Of A Down in 2001, Queens of the Stone Age in 2002, Mars Volta in 2003). Likely candidates for 2004? It'd be silly to speculate, since it's always something I never expected. Suffice to say, there's a few bands that have sparked a small amount of interest in me, and that's usually how it begins (Tool being the exception; they merely surpassed all expectations with Lateralus). At any rate, Nine Inch Nails, System Of A Down and Slayer are all on pace to release new material by year's end, so maybe the state of music isn't as bad as I thought it was.

Recent purchases: Amen and Secret Machines, as well as the Rock Against Bush compilation. All were okay, but none blew my mind (at least, not on first listen; judgment hasn't been passed quite yet).

That's about it. Oh, for those who haven't been to the guestbook, The Riddler returned with the numeric message. I haven't bothered trying to decode it, since that's exactly what they want me to do. However, if you have some extra time on your hands and want to tell me what the hell they're saying, go for it.

End transmission

Willie's Top 40
For the week ending May 28, 2004

LW TW Artist - Title
-----------------------------------------
03 01 HOOBASTANK - The Reason
05 02 POWDERFINGER - On My Mind
01 03 A PERFECT CIRCLE - The Outsider
02 04 JET - Cold Hard Bitch
09 05 CLUTCH - The Mob Goes Wild
08 06 THE OFFSPRING - (Can't Get My) Head Around You
04 07 THE TREWS - Not Ready To Go
12 08 VELVET REVOLVER - Slither
06 09 LOSTPROPHETS - Last Train Home
11 10 JAY-Z - 99 Problems
15 11 THORNLEY - So Far So Good
13 12 THE TRAGICALLY HIP - Vaccination Scar
07 13 THE MARS VOLTA - Televators
18 14 INCUBUS - Talk Shows On Mute
10 15 BRAND NEW - Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades
17 16 AMEN - California's Bleeding
20 17 BAD RELIGION - Los Angeles Is Burning
24 18 BEASTIE BOYS - Ch-Check It Out
14 19 THE VINES - Ride
21 20 SEETHER - Broken
16 21 AUDIOSLAVE - What You Are
23 22 LENNY KRAVITZ - Where Are We Runnin'?
29 23 AUF DER MAUR - Followed The Waves
19 24 ALEXISONFIRE - Waterwings
26 25 BLACK LABEL SOCIETY - House Of Doom
28 26 THE DARKNESS - Growing On Me
31 27 LOCAL H - California Songs
30 28 THE DISTILLERS - Beat Your Heart Out
22 29 SWITCHFOOT - Dare You To Move
34 30 BILLY TALENT - River Below
33 31 MATTHEW GOOD - Alert Status Red
35 32 DIVISION OF LAURA LEE - Does Compute
25 33 LIARS - There's Always Room On The Broom
36 34 NEW FOUND GLORY - All Downhill From Here
38 35 SLIPKNOT - Duality
NE 36 STERIOGRAM - Walkie Talkie Man
32 37 DROWNING POOL - Step Up
39 38 FOUNTAINS OF WAYNE - Hey Julie
27 39 FINGER ELEVEN - Absent Elements
NE 40 SECRET MACHINES - Sad And Lonely

ON RADAR...
----------------------
BEN KWELLER - The Rules
THE KILLERS - Somebody Told Me
LACUNA COIL - Swamped
FINGER ELEVEN - Stay In Shadow
THE TRAGICALLY HIP - Summer's Killing Us
MONSTER MAGNET - Unbroken (Hotel Baby)
HOOBASTANK - Same Direction
LOSTPROPHETS - Wake Up (Make A Move)

And remember, kids... 1843136 46 65116466 15+6 ~4684463e1/2.

Take care now.

I Make A Difference... I Care

So, having started my new job in February, I never really thought about advancing all that quickly. But, apparently, someone in the office sees something in me because out of 50+ workers, I was awarded Employee of the Month for April. That was before my 60-day probationary period even ended.

Wow... imagine what rewards I could reap if I actually gave two shits about the place!

The Return of Willie's Top 40

Back online by unpopular demand, here's the top rock in the land as I see it.

For the week ending May 21, 2004:

LW TW Artist-Title
-- -- ------------
03 01 A Perfect Circle - The Outsider
02 02 Jet - Cold Hard Bitch
06 03 Hoobastank - The Reason
04 04 The Trews - Not Ready To Go
08 05 Powderfinger - On My Mind
01 06 Lostprophets - Last Train Home
05 07 The Mars Volta - Televators
09 08 The Offspring - Can't Get My Head Around You
13 09 Clutch - The Mob Goes Wild
10 10 Brand New - Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades
14 11 Jay-Z - 99 Problems
16 12 Velvet Revolver - Slither
19 13 The Tragically Hip - Vaccination Scar
07 14 The Vines - Ride
17 15 Thornley - So Far So Good
11 16 Audioslave - What You Are
18 17 Amen - California's Bleeding
20 18 Incubus - Talk Shows On Mute
12 19 Alexisonfire - Waterwings
25 20 Bad Religion - Los Angeles Is Burning
22 21 Seether - Broken
21 22 Switchfoot - Dare You To Move
23 23 Lenny Kravitz - Where Are We Runnin'?
28 24 Beastie Boys - Ch-Check It Out
15 25 Liars - There's Always Room On The Broom
26 26 Black Label Society - House Of Doom
24 27 Finger Eleven - Absent Elements
29 28 The Darkness - Growing On Me
31 29 Auf der Maur - Followed The Waves
32 30 The Distillers - Beat Your Heart Out
34 31 Local H - California Songs
27 32 Drowning Pool - Step Up
37 33 Matthew Good - Alert Status Red
36 34 Billy Talent - River Below
-- 35 Division Of Laura Lee - Does Compute
39 36 New Found Glory - All Downhill From Here
33 37 Anthrax - What Doesn't Die
40 38 Slipknot - Duality
-- 39 Fountains Of Wayne - Hey Julie
30 40 Mushroomhead - Crazy

Another Year Older, Another Year Number

So I've survived this hellacious, pothole-ridden ride I call my life into the dawn of its 29th year. and, what have I learned? Let's recap, shall we?

- It's never a good idea when you're four years old to be too smart for your age. If this happens, you may see some graffitti on a sign, identify it, and shout the word "cunt" in the presence of your parents.

- It's never a good idea when you're five years old to taunt someone older, bigger and stronger than you, then run away. If this happens, you may realize that when this person catches you, you stand the chance of getting hauled down and having your head split open on the pavement.

- It's never a good idea when you're eight years old to throw a hissy fit that culminates in you shouting at your mother to "make me a fucking sandwich!" If this happens, you may very well get a sandwich, but you'll also get more guilt than you can handle.

- It's never a good idea when you're ten years old to willingly become a passenger on a snowmobile while your father (who you know has been drinking) is driving it. If this happens, it's quite possible that you could hit a rock buried by snow, lose your footing, and end up with your ankle so severely broken that your foot literally hangs perilously close to the point of amputation, will never fully heal, and leave you with a nasty scar where the jagged bone poked out.

- It's never a good idea when you're thirteen years old to go on a week-long road trip taking only one album to listen to. If this happens, you may never bring yourself to forgive Roxette for the horrible flashbacks they've caused you.

- It's never a good idea when you're sixteen years old to chug three glasses of vodka and orange juice as your first experience with alcohol. If this happens, you may make out with someone you never intended on taking to the prom, let alone having said date be tripped out on seven hits of acid on what should have been one of the most defining nights of a young man's life.

- It's never a good idea when you're eighteen years old to chug three glasses of vodka and peach juice as a celebration of your first week in college. If this happens, you may have sex with someone you never intended on being your first lay, let alone having said first lay get wasted on Hermits wine some days later, fall down and cut her asscheek on a cassette tape case, leaving you and your buddy in the examination room of the local hospital, forced to choose which one gets to hold the wound shut while the other holds the bedpan for her to puke into.

- It's never a good idea when you're eighteen years old to treat a woman's heart as a plaything. If this happens, you might get what you want in the short term, but years later you find yourself wishing you could talk to the ones you've hurt, just to know that they're okay.

- It's never a good idea when you're eighteen years old to commit to a long term relationship that you're uneasy about from the start. If this happens, before you know it, you've invested too much time and trust to just get away from it, forcing yourself to years of unnecessary risk and stress.

- It's never a good idea when you're twenty-one years old to bring a child into the world, knowing full well that what is supposed to bring two people closer together will inevitably tear them apart. If this happens, your life changes forever, as you must struggle to live with the fact that this tiny person you would give your very life for... well, you just did.

- It's never a good idea when you're twenty-four years old to father a second child in the hopes that it will serve as some sort of last ditch effort in salvaging a family unit. If this happens, prepare yourself for any number of adverse reactions, not the least of which being the revelation that the woman you invested so much love and time into once slept with your best friend. Soon enough, she will find someone else, pick up stakes, and take your children far away, where you will hardly ever see them again. This, my friends, will lead to a long, hard look into the mirror. You will weigh the pros and cons of suicide very seriously. Luckily, your mortal soul will be spared by listening to Pearl Jam's "Indifference".

- It's ALWAYS a good idea when you're twenty-six years old to exhibit class and professionalism in the face of a forced exit from the business you schooled for two years to command. If this happens, not only will you be able to politely thank all those who supported you, play "Indifference" for all the land to hear as your last act and walk out with head held high despite the uncontrollable tears, you will also be flipping the ultimate bird to those who betrayed you, leaving them with the sudden realization that they have, indeed, let one of the true professionals fall through the cracks. This will be your legacy and, though you will never work for those people again, you will be remembered as a class act to the bitter end.

- It's never a good idea when you're twenty-seven years old to take a job just for money. If this happens, you could find yourself in a situation where you sacrifice your happiness for the sake of a few extra dollars. Eventually, you will quit this job, and slip into a deep depression. Thoughts of suicide will again surface, only by now you've mastered the "Indifference" technique, so you'll be fine. Regardless, you will wish you hadn't left the job you loved for a quick buck.

So, I guess that brings us to now. I'm sure there are many more important lessons to learn, though I've no clue as to what they will be, or when they will be taught. All I can say as the newest member of the 28-year old club is... live for yourself. I've made so many mistakes thus far, and the vast majority have been a direct result of trying foolheartedly to please those around me. I shall vow, here and now, to better myself as an individual, in the hopes of evoking a positive effect in others. I am breaking in my current state; I have traded my rock shirts and jeans for business casual, and it sickens me. I am not a number, destined to mull through life in a cubicle. I can, and WILL inflict change. It will be a slow process, but I can do this. I will find myself again, if I have to search every inch of this country. I was once a content, easy-going man. I could once talk and laugh with my fiancee for hours at a time. Now, I am uptight, drained, and slipping into depression yet again. I see my children, on average, four times a year. I see my fiancee, on average, two hours a day. This is unacceptable. I want my life back, and I will sacrifice anything short of my life itself to reclaim it.

I will smile again soon. Only this time, it won't be for show.

Pub Crawl?! What Pub Crawl?

So here's the deal. For the past three years, I've organized the Willie Pub Crawl, an evening of drunken debauchery and general mayhem shared with my circle of friends. In 2001, we ran rampant in the streets of Miramichi, apparently smashing a beer bottle over someone's head in the process (at least, that's what the moron who accosted us seemed to think). In 2002, we took the show on the road, and F-city has never been the same (okay, I suppose it kind of has). Last year, we brought it back to the roots, hitting the 'chi harder than a whore on payday.

And as for this year? There is no pub crawl.

See, I'm going to be 28 years old on the 18th. The time for wandering aimlessly from bar to bar in a drunken stupor seems... I don't know... behind me, I guess. Call it maturity, delusional musings of a mind that's much too sober, whatever you want. What it all boils down to is that I don't see the allure of saving every last penny I have to drive a car that needs engine work 2-1/2 hours across the province just so I can get drunk and make an ass out of myself, then have to bother someone for a place to crash, get up the next morning, spend my last five bucks on breakfast, come home hungover and penniless five days before payday.

Granted, I really wanted to see gNosh play again, as they're always mucho bueno. But, I've decided (after much deliberation) to keep the bash closer to home. Besides, as the vast majority of my friends are in the 'chi, and wouldn't be able to make the trip to F-city, it just kind of makes sense to kick it at the homestead. That way, instead of getting wasted with a few select friends, I can get wasted with MOST of my friends.

Anyway, the tentative plan is to have ourselves a barbecue on the 15th of May (that'd be a Saturday) at a yet unconfirmed location (trust me, we're working on it and it's 95% at this point; you don't really think I'd dangle a steak in front of your face and then yank it away, do you?... okay, you're right). Follow that up with some more drinking, some rock n' roll blasting from the stereo, and a game of cards or two is bound to break out. And, for some strange reason, that seems a hell of a lot more fun to me than paying cover charge + $3.50 a drink to spend the night in a darkened room full of sweaty, barely legal cheerleader wannabes.

I think I'm gay.